"I don't care if monday's black"

Had a weird experience today, was sitting in class, thinking about things in general, and my mind went to a party happening this weekend. You know when you've got something good coming up and you get that giddy little surge, a little thrill, well, I had one of those. When it feels, for an instant like the world is big, bright, and yours to enjoy, essentially a moment of ridiculous blinding optimism. But at the same time, I was aware that this picture wouldn't reconcile with the state of affairs. Then it just got to feeling like a big and sad place.

Still, confused giddiness aside, I'm still counting days and I've no right to complain, nor is there any point, because as I am still sure, I'm doing the least depressing, realistic thing I can think of.
Now, let me think, aren't I due some holidays pretty soon?

Hmm, this all feels like it's building up to something (still).
I don't like the sound of that.
Still, it's in my hands so for me to see that it doesn't.